Mommy’s tired

Every mom I know, is tired. Soooo fucking tired. I haven’t had a night off in 406 days and counting. I’m sorry to all the people who don’t have kids that get offended when we glare at them when they whine about being tired… cause it’s not the same, no matter how you put it. Most single, childless people, are tired because of THEIR OWN CHOICE. Be it work, love life, social life, hobbies, (unless they suffer from mental illness but even then they have chances to get at least some rest) I remember those days, and sure I was tired, or at least I thought I was…

Moms… full time moms… we’re on the brink of insanity. If not already over the edge. We run on minimal sleep, I’m talking like sleep deprivation at Guantanamo Bay, (have you ever had a colicky baby?) been held from sleep against your will? That’s what having children is like. Moms plan EVERYTHING for the household : meals, chores, stock inventory, taxi kids to school and back, taxi them to extracurricular activities and back, keep the animals alive, keep the kids from hurting themselves (which for me seems to be a daily chore) and no I don’t mean they’re suicidal at all, I mean they’re kids, 14 months and 7yrs old, they don’t think of consequences they just act, especially the toddler, who daily tries to dive head first off the couch. And every time I catch her and I feel my heart rate soar through the roof.

Somewhere, in among the mess you’re supposed to look after yourself. When really my idea of looking after myself is sitting by myself outside in abject silence for an hour and then coming inside, stuffing my face with peanut butter on toast and watching Greys Anatomy while drinking a cup of tea, by myself. (Sometimes when I have the energy I make it to the gym before doing the above, but if I’m exhausted, well hell thats my night.)

(Notice how many times i said “by myself” lol)

What should I be doing? Moisturizing, saving for school, planning things for our future, probably some yoga and meditation, but I just don’t have it in me to give that much back to myself or the world yet. I wish I did. I’ll get into why that’s an issue for me in my next post.Anyway, my point is, when u think a stay at home mom does nothing all day, you’re wrong. And we’re tired. We don’t have a boss we can call and say we don’t feel well we’re not coming in. We can’t really have someone cover for us (it’ll work for a few hours but then they always want mommy back). We’re on call 24/7,we don’t sleep in, we don’t get holidays, and we don’t get any job incentives except the beauty of watching our children grow, which granted is an inexplicable experience that I am so honoured for! But sometimes I wish this job had Christmas parties, co workers, bonuses, I know at the end of the day my sacrifice is what is best for my children, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say I can’t wait until the baby is old enough for school and mommy can start to have herself back again.

And ya I’m an asshole for saying that

And I’m a mom for saying that ^^^

(Why do we feel guilty the second we think about what we want!? Lol. #momproblems)

Edit: from my Facebook post comment: “And to the moms who do go to work full time, u ladies r soldiers, especially the ones with the little ones. In my next post I’ll explain why I’m not quite ready to join back to the work force, but u ladies are amazing, and deserve an extra large latte delivered to ur office daily, with flowers”