First of all, when I heard Jenji Kohan had another show out, I was ecstatic, so, I fired up Netflix and tuned in.

Second… did we know this is a true story!!!!!

Here’s the recap of episode 1:

We open the show and are shown not only Piper’s gorgeous physique, but also the quick realization between institutionalization and the reminiscence of things that once were. The first inmate we see, although are not introduced to, is the colourful Taystee, who compliments Piper on her tits.

-Breaks to the intro song-

HOW MUCH DO WE LOVE THIS SONG! If you get past the siren like cry of her voice the words are so epic for this show:

Regina Spektor- You’ve got time

The animals, the animals
Trapped, trapped, trapped ’till the cage is full
The cage is full
Stay awake
In the dark, count mistakes
The light was off but now it’s on
Searching the ground for a bitter song
The sun is out, the day is new
And everyone is waiting, waiting on you
And you’ve got time
And you’ve got time

Think of all the roads
Think of all their crossings
Taking steps is easy
Standing still is hard
Remember all their faces
Remember all their voices
Everything is different
The second time around

Instantly we see how selfish Piper’s pregnant friend Polly is, when she exclaims her anguish of Piper missing her baby shower, of all things. Piper’s facing prison, I’m pretty sure whatever her friend is going through is trivial in comparison.

We see our first look of Piper and Larry’s relationship, and when she goes to pee, she breaks…

I broke too… did you? How could that feel? Knowing tomorrow you’re going to prison.

When Piper told her family what happened, they seem more shocked that she was a lesbian than the fact that she was a criminal, perhaps the first inclination that she’s been hiding this for more reasons than one.

It’s funny how one of the most important things for her to do before entering prison is to update her facebook status. It’s like we’re posting a note on the boards for survivors “Hello world! I’ll be gone for a while! don’t forget me!” It’s strange the things we take for granted.

As she’s being admitted Larry rushes in, she tells the guard this is her”fiance” and the guard replies “good luck with that” instantly im repulsed as I would remain faithful no problem, but analyzing the situation Larry’s character seems weak, and I’m not certain he can hang in there for Piper. Also, Piper seems like she’s hiding a lot more than she’s giving up, so perhaps this wasn’t a match made in heaven?

Our next flashback takes us to Piper stripping for Alex, and thus we see how it all began…

The next two inmates are Morello and Watson. Morello is planning some wedding, and Watson just seems “hood.”

Our first glimpse of the guards plays right into our stereotypes of “dumb guards,” even the cute new one, Bennett. Mendez is the authoritative, perv-stash rocking guard.

Her Counselor Healy advises her “keep to yourself, and don’t make friends,” we’ll see how well she heeds his warning.

We see our first look into Daya’s disfunctional latina family when someone comes up and slaps her, and we find out it’s her mother.

And perhaps the last, but most important interaction Piper has is with Red, the prison’s resident communist cook. After Piper insults her food, and we start to realize just how thin the ice is in prison, Piper gets her first welcome gift…

a bloody tampon sandwich…

and as she’s about to lose her shit… she see’s Alex…

And the scene turns orange…

ONTO EPISODE 2!!!!!!!