The IKEA Nightmare

Today I found the guts to go to IKEA to get the missing hardware to hang my wall mirrors. I decided I would get there as soon as they opened to avoid excess crowds and get in and out….

HAHAHAHA Have you ever set foot in IKEA and been in and out? 

As I drove up to the parking lot at 10:08am, the lot was already packed. I don’t know why I thought it would be otherwise considering they offer $2 breakfast. 

I knew the furniture hardware was available downstairs but not the mirror hardware, so I decided to brave the “show room” in hopes of finding the parts. What I entered was furniture Narnia, I’m surprised Mr.Tumnus didn’t pop out from behind a KRABB curtain and ask me to join him for tea.

Like any female, I had to fight the urge to shop, So I kept my eyes on the prize (ok for the most part, I made the occasional glance at a chandelier and almost picked up a cushion.) Don’t judge me, most wouldn’t even be that strong! 

I made the mistake of wearing one of the furs my nana gave me, and mid way the anxiety of not seeing a window ANYWHERE made me hot and dizzy. I kept following the “shortcut to checkout” signs, but that’s the biggest pile of bullshit I’ve ever seen in my life. There was nothing “short” about it. 

Finally I noticed the smell of dust lessening and fresh air creeping in when I saw the checkouts ahead.

I almost made it out IKEA without purchasing anything until I saw Audrey. I’ve been a huge fan of Audrey Hepburn since I was little and resolved to take the canvas home that moment and hang it as soon as I was home.

Shit! You win IKEA… 


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